The Awesomeness of Snickers Dark Bars and Disrepectful Youths

I worked a real shift today, 9:30 to 5. So around 12:30 I got my lunch break and decided to have a bagel sandwich. Delicious. I then went to the SunMart and bought a Snicker Dark Bar the best damn candy bar that has ever been made, ever, by man or by god. Seriously. Best. Enjoyed it as I walked back to work. A few stores from work I could hear some commotion. Three skater douche type teenagers yelling at at an old lady for parking in a spot that blocked their skating. Now if I had not been mellowed out by my Delicious Snickers Dark Bar I might have said something (and ran, those little fuckers are dangerous). Later I was so pissed. Like old man pissed. Fuck them hooligans. People have to park, assholes. Moral of the story? Snickers dark bars will solve any anger issues you might have. I might have. So I think I should eat them constantly. I can almost hear the fat jokes...
Also Fuck Teenagers.



And Skaters Douche Types.




Except Tony Hawk.



He seems like a nice man.

Fast Food VS Me

So I decided a while back to stop eating fast food for various reasons (money issues & my fat ass mostly). It is certainly not the first time I've done so. As a matter of fact it's probably the fourth of filth time this year alone. Now, the first week or so is usually pretty hard. Mostly out of habit or laziness I would want to just stop at McDonald's or something on the way home from work. After the first couple of times of resisting temptation it becomes much easier. After that first week fast food starts becoming more and more unappealing. You literally start to wonder why anyone, including your former self, would ever eat it. But...

There always comes a moment, sometimes months in when you get sneak attacked by fast food, like some kind of fat ninja. This last time I was able to avoid fast food for about two and a half months. I was all up on the high horse with my "I don't need that shit in my body" or "look at those people and their Big Macs, Ew". Then I come home from work one day and in the fridge was some left over Panda Express. MOTHER FUCK PANDA EXPRESS!!!! I LOVE IT. I decided I'd have some of the leftovers and that it didn't really count. Bullshit. I know. A god damned mistake. I know. I ate it anyway. I went about my evening and later went to bed. The next day I was off work and woke up at about noonish. Lunchtime. And the only thing I could even imagine eating was Panda-fuck-Express. With it's fucking cute fat tits panda mascot and delicious Orange Chicken.

I cant really blame Panda Express (or pandas) for my lack of will power. That was all me. I went and I partook. Orange Chicken. Chow Mien. Egg Roll. Largy Dr. Pepper. Next day my Fast Food fast was broken along with my spirits. It was all my fault too. Or there is cocaine in Panda Express food. Probably my fault. I'm currently planning a new and improved try at this whole thing. See if I can kick the shit for real this time. Wish me luck.

Soccer (football) Damn You!!

Wednesday the U.S. soccer team beat the number one team in the world, Spain 2-0 in the Confederations Cup. Spain had not lost a game in their last 35 international matches. The U.S. was final bound for the first time ever in a FIFA tournament. As a soccer fan this was the biggest upset of all time. Spirits were insanely high for us weirdos. Thursday Brazil beat South Africa 1-0 for the other spot in the final. Now a week ago there was no way any one would give the us a chance in hell against Brazil but after Spain, anything was possible. I was all over watching this game and excited as mother fucking shit. BUT....I worked all day on Saturday. Also it was Cool Desert Nights or as i call it: Idiot-asshole-dumbass-car-fuckers-horrible-cunt-cluster-fucka-rama featuring dumbest fuck customers ever. I came home and played Bad Company until way too late. I fell asleep until about 1:00pm on Sunday. I woke up to hear that the U.S. had blown a 2-0 halftime lead and lost 3-2 to Brazil. I was so fucking disappointed I turned the TV off without even watching the highlights. It's been a while since I had hope in anything at all, really and what happens? Disappointment. There you have it soccer proves that all hope is gone. No we can't.

MySpace Left Behind (#1)

For the longest time I've only been blogging through my MySpace profile. However since I started using Twitter (sweet-ish) MySpace (lame-ish) is falling by the wayside. There for I bring you my blog that is Not For Human Minds. (Warning my blogs will contain horrible language and lots of bitching and extremly personal informantion and sexually graphic content)