Significance

Osama Bin Laden is Dead.

My first instinct is to try to find someway to be cynical or comment on our American obsession with revenge. Eye for an eye and all that.

But no.

On September 11 I was scared and uncertain as I know many others were. I cried. Not initially for the life lost but because I was truly scared. It was the first time I felt that deep a turmoil involving my own safety. The one constant of my life, the strength and invincibility of my home country seem to be collapsing before my eyes. Then I did feel an overwhelming sadness for the people who died. The pictures that I saw that entire day at school, in every class were, in a word, devastating. The pain and suffering seemed to be greater than just the individuals directly affected. It was pain and terror our young generation had never know and was not prepared for. The years that have followed have been hard and at times tragic for our country. Uncertainty and anger tinged we youth and was stuck down deep in us. After years we seemed to give up not only on finding Bin Laden but seemingly on justice itself.

Now after hearing the news that Bin Laden is indeed dead, I am happy. Not at the death of a man but at the liberation of a generation. The assassin of our innocences is dead and I say we deserve to celebrate.

My cynicism is intact but for tonight I can't help but put in aside and let a feeling of relief and triumph take it's place.

"I've never wished a man dead but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure." - Mark Twain

Passion

I love to cook.

I love everything about it. I love shopping to find ingredients, looking for new recipes, throwing out recipes all together, experimenting, testing, tasting, and trying again. I like rushing and raving and doing things fast. I like slowing down, waiting, simmering and stewing. I like it all.

And it makes me happy.

I mean really and truly happy.

And it does it better than anything else in my life. Better than my family or friends (no offense I do love you guys), better than my favorite song on a perfect day, or the smile of a million babies. When I'm cooking I am doing something that I am truly comfortable doing, something that comes naturally to me. That, in and of itself, is enough to make it my favorite thing in the world.

See, I am not good at very many things. As a matter of fact I'm not even OK at many things. I'm out of shape, bad at sports, bad at math, and a terrible writer. I have some social anxiety issues which makes me pretty bad at talking to, well, humans. I'm uncomfortable and akward in nearly 90% of my daily life.

But then there's the kitchen.

I will venture to boast that I AM GOOD AT COOKING. I'm smart at cooking. I'm even GREAT at cooking sometimes. I know it. I have it down and the things I don't know I can pick up with ease. It's in my heart and down deep.

It means so much to be that this past Thanksgiving my family went to my brothers future in-laws to eat. This meant we didn't have to cook anything. I was so upset that I insisted that I be allowed to cook a second thanksgiving meal at our house a week later. Which I did. Turkey (brined for 8 hours and roasted), mashed potatoes (both garlic rosemary and traditional plain), dressing (sausage, sage and apple), green beans (sauteed with bacon and garlic), and homemade yeast rolls (best I've ever made).

Sounds stupid right? I spent an entire paycheck on food just to have the pleasure of busting my ass for 12 hours to cook it all myself on a Sunday.

Such is my relationship with cooking, my one true passion.

What's yours?

Preparation Is Key

In the months that have past since my last post I have written then deleted nearly 30 blogs that I never posted. After each attempt I would read over it and realize that some thing was dramatically wrong with it in some way. Too whiny, too crass, too downright stupid even. So I deleted and deleted again never getting the satisfaction of publishing anything.

So get ready because hopefully over the next few days I will be letting loose nearly six months of tension, anger, humor, hate, and love. It will all certainly be...

Not For Human Minds.

disclaimer: This might all be a giant load of fucking bullshit and you won't hear from me for another six months.

The Fall

The cool air and turning leaves. I love the fall. The summer is to sweaty and the spring always reminds me of how lonely I am but the fall, the fall just feels right. I get to wear more and more clothing to cover my bulbous anatomy and not look that homeless. Somehow the fading colors and falling leaves are very comforting to me. It's as if they are saying "Even nature gets tired of being bright and cheerful".
There is something else about fall that I really look forward to as well: The Holidays. From Halloween on to New Years is my favorite time of the year. I enjoy the twisted fun of Halloween and all the pseudo pagan rituals and symbolism (and the candy obviously).
Then there is Thanksgiving, the biggest meal of the year and a cooks favorite holiday. I love the rituals of preparing food in general but especially the family related ones of Thanksgiving. We all sit down and decide who is cooking what, without needing to discuss what will be served. It's all so traditional and planned out and a good break from half-ass non-conformist type life.
Then there's Christmas. If you don't like Christmas then I'm sorry your family hates you/are dead. Mine don't/aren't so I love it. It's the one time of the year it's safe to care about frivolous things and express how much you care for those around you. If only it didn't have to be only once a year.

Location:George Washington Way,Richland,United States

Video Not For Human Minds

Bought a new webcam and decided to add an new element to my blog! If I ever start posting on a regular basis (fingers crossed) I will include one video each month (if people seem to like it that is.) Here's the first, behold!

Move Around To Play Video Games? Fuck Right Off!

Years ago when Nintendo announced they were going to be releasing a new console I was very fucking thrilled. Why not? The consoles that introduced me to video games and played a major part in how I developed as child were all made by Nintendo. So many memories and all of them good. No other corporation could claim nearly such lofty status. Then I heard it would be called The Wii or wee. I sort of chuckled it off like most fan boys with the inescapable "I'm gonna play with my Wii so Hard. BAhahahahah!" Then I heard about the controller and saw videos of people waving them about like fucking magic wands. Still I could not think an ill thought of my beloved Nintendo. Finally it was released and I had a chance to play it for the first time at a buddies house. We played Wii Sports (as if anyone played any other Wii games that first few months). Started with golf and then bowling and went on playing each one after the other. My first thoughts were "This is great" and 'Wow, motion controls are the shit.' But after a short time I realized that something very bad was actually occurring here. By the time we got to boxing I had come to the conclusion that Nintendo may have just halted a two and a half decades of innovation and forward momentum in gaming and made the console equivalent of a family board game. There I was in the living room of a small white family who had never owned a gaming system, whose kids were fit and played sports, the average american family you might say, and they were all eating the shit up. The mainstream was coming and with it the homogenization (further homogenization in some peoples minds) of the video game industry.

Fast forward to this year and both Xbox (my new goto console) and Playstation announce their own version of "motion controllers" for "casual gamers", Kinetic and Move respectively. Fuck. After the Wii tragedy I dismissed Nintendo (ecxept for one or two remakes that sucked and The DS) saying "Let them make games for the average mouth breathing idiots (and kids) I have my Xbox to do some serious and mature gaming. However, now I get that same feeling from the living room. The coming storm. But now it's coming for ALL gamers and ALL consoles. (PC gamers shut your nerd mouths)

Okay, do I think Kinetic and Move are goin to murder Xbox and PlayStation like the Wii murdered Nintendo? No. What I fear is they are goin to be successful because of thier appeal (mouth breathers) and that in turn the game industry will start to focus more attention on making lots of causual games and leaving the serious game makers with a smaller share of both the market and the budgets. Then the only games that will be made for adults will be shitty frat boy games (Call Of Duty 8: Modern War Of 1812?) and idiot proof Japanese style games (Final Fantasy 22: Press a for 60 hours while techno plays and you win.)

Anyway here's hoping Kinetic and Move fail and games are left to us unattractive socially awkward types with very dexterous fingers.

(Hear that ladies? Dexterous fingers.)

Random-itude

There have been some things of my mind lately. Here are a few...

Video Games

I like them and don't give a fuck what a chin-less jackass, who has never played one, has to say about them not being art. Fuck off back to movie land if you want me to give a shit what you say Ebert! (because I DO care what a chin-less jackass has to say about movies)

Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

I like it too, for three main reasons: I love Meso-American culture. I find any depiction of it interesting and the legend of the crystal skulls even more so. I think Harrison Ford is the greatest actor in all nerd history. Han Solo? Deckard? Indy? Enough said. I went in to watching it knowing exactly what to expect. Yes it's has ridiculous moments and situations but so did all the others. Are aliens more far fetched than the power of god melting nazis? I think not.

Twitter

Is officially the best way to find out that the people who make the things you love are, in fact, douche bags or assholes. Ex: Kevin Smith, Olivia Munn, and Brian Lee O'malley.

Check Writing

At my job we have a policy that states if a purchase is over twenty dollars we can not take a check for it. Every time I see someone pull out a check book I tell them our policy but something else happens. I get pissed off, on the inside. Who has a damn check book nowadays? For fucks sake get a debit card! Even worst is when I see someone pull out the check book and tell them the bad news and then they pull out a debit card! WTF?! Just use that all the time fucker! Now if it were just little old ladies doing it I would be much more understanding but most of the time it's some uppity middle aged person who should know better. Seriously can we just eliminate checks already? At least in retail situations?

Magnets

How do they work?

Juggalos

Are they really that stupid?

(yes)

Gogol Bordello

These guys are awesome. Their new album Trans-Continental Hustle is a huge step forward for them. Musically they have really refined things and added even more international influence to their sound. I would describe this album as gypsy punk rock with splashes of Spanish guitar and even jazz and blues mixed about. Check it out! Only 7.99 on iTunes

"We gonna build a new globalizer

Without pantzerfaust or a shmiser

And may the sound of our contaminated beat

Sweep all the Nazi purists off their feet"